Slow Clap Presents: Shucks, That's Sweet...Corn?

Real Story. Real Stupid.

I was grocery shopping at Target when I happened upon some peculiar looking corn.  Four ears of "trimmed" corn placed on a clear plastic tray and then wrapped in plastic wrap.  I stopped for the obvious photo opportunity.

The corn in question is that of Van Solkema Family Farms.  The corn has the ends cut and has been shucked save for a small strip that is left for some reason.  I am forced to surmise that the reason the strip of green husk is left for one of two reasons.  My first guess is that it looks appealing to potential buyers, no pun intended.  My second guess is that the sort of people who buy this corn like to peel that last little strip of husk away all by themselves to make the experience more authentic without the burden of having to shuck the entire ear of corn.    

I decided to reach out to the Van Solkema Family and inquire as to why they package their corn this way.  In a shocking twist, wait, no, they didn't respond.  

On a return visit to Target, I saw the corn packaged slightly different.  All was the same except the clear plastic tray was replaced with black styrofoam.  Maybe the clear plastic tray was uncomfortable for the corn and it needed something just a bit softer?  I'm not entirely sure but I believe the styrofoam is worse since it can't even be recycled.  If your garbage is being incinerated, the styrofoam might be slightly better.

The cost of this fancy corn is $3.99.  So really, that's a dollar each.  Regular corn is usually 50 cents each or depending on the time of year, you can get 4 for a dollar or even 8 for a dollar.  Why are people willing to pay such an exorbitant price for this sissy corn?  If you were forced to pay that much for corn you would be outraged.  It makes no sense. 

My two cents:  This is not the way you should buy corn.  Corn doesn't need to be placed on a tray and wrapped in plastic like it is some fragile commodity.  This is how a**holes buy their corn, don't be an a**hole, buy your corn in its natural packaging, the husk.

Rating:  I give pussy corn, yes, pussy corn 1 out of 5 possible slow claps.  I'd like to give more because it's just so freaking stupid but it isn't Earth-shattering, regardless of how stupid I think it is.