Real Story. Real Stupid.
"A pile of sh!t is still a pile of sh!t, regardless of how pretty you wrap it"
-B. Stebber
Whenever I am stuck on what to talk about on Tuesdays for Slow Clap Presents, I take a stroll past the toy aisle and I always have an abundance of ideas.
On one such stroll, I was reminded of a toy that I had seen plenty of around the holidays, L.O.L. Surprise! I didn't know what it was, other than it is a plastic case that contains a mystery toy. I decided to look into what this toy really is and what I soon learned is that it is far stupider than I could have imagined.
L.O.L. Surprise! is made by MGA Entertainment. That stands for Micro Games America Entertainment for anyone who cares. MGA Entertainment produces Bratz, Baby Born, Lalaloopsy, Num Noms, and Moxie Girls.
L.O.L. Surprise was released in December of 2016 and was the number one toy in 2017. The company hoped to double sales in 2018 but that information is not yet available, although I would bet money that they did double sales. MGA Entertainment is located in Los Angeles, California but L.O.L. Surprise! is produced in China which comes as a great shock to no one.
L.O.L. Surprise is modeled after the popular 'unboxing" videos that are disgustingly popular with children on Youtube. Anyone with young children knows the horror of Ryan Toys Review-more on that later. Unboxing videos have driven the market for "surprise" type toys. To children, the element of surprise offers extra excitement that all children love. It's the feeling of instant gratification mixed with Christmas morning bliss that makes these toys irresistible.
Ryan, of Ryan Toys Review, has made a virtual career off of unboxing videos and giving a review of the toys inside. Ryan now has a line of his own toys which features some surprise type toys. I blame Ryan's parents for this downfall of the human race.
Each L.O.L. Surprise consists of multiple layers of "surprises." Basically, it's a plastic ball or case, a piece of sh!t toy, other pieces of plastic, plastic wrapping, and maybe a few more plastic balls. Some contain Little Sisters that can change color or a Big Sister that can change color, pee, cry, or spit. A small surprise ball will contain 7 layers and each layer is separated by more packaging. For example, Layer 1 in the secret message, layer 2 is collectible stickers, layer 3 is a bottle, layer 4 is shoes, layer 5 is an outfit, layer 6 is an accessory, and finally, layer 7 is the doll.
The majority of what you buy is literal garbage and the toy itself is of lower quality than a McDonald's Happy Meal toy. Remember that plastic toys cannot be recycled. They are just trash at the end of their life. Although, with L.O.L. Surprise, it seems to be garbage right from the beginning.
My two cents: What a stupid piece of sh!t. The toy is garbage, the packaging is garbage, and the lesson you are teaching your child from buying this sort of crap is most certainly garbage.
Rating: I give L.O.L. Surprise! 3 out of 5 possible slow claps because the premise is appalling as is the amount of waste it creates.
Surprise, it's garbage!
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