Friday, May 31, 2019

Dear Betty: Reader Question 5/31/2019 Grilling with Aluminum Foil

Hi Betty,
Grilling season is back and I have a question about aluminum foil.  I like to wrap vegetables or sliced up potatoes in foil and grill them that way.  I've heard that using aluminum foil on the grill is bad for you and I'm wondering what other options there are.
Thank you,
A

Dear A,
Thanks so much for the question and for reading the blog! 

Aluminum is one of the most plentiful metals on our planet and is naturally occurring in many foods that you already eat.  Fruits, vegetables, meat, dairy, and grain all contain some aluminum.  Aluminum is also present in some medications, especially antacids.  Consuming aluminum in this manner is considered relatively safe as very little is actually absorbed into your body and the rest is excreted through feces or urine.

When you take aluminum foil and grill it at that high temperature, it cracks and flakes on a molecular level.  The heat and breakdown of the material allow the metal to leach into your food, even more so when you have spicy or acidic food such as lemons.  Some studies suggest this amount of aluminum is higher than what is safe and it is more than what the World Health Organization feels is acceptable.

So is it safe to use aluminum foil on the grill?  My answer is that I'm not sure either way.

I did look into alternatives for aluminum foil but most are not great.  You can use copper grilling sheets or a silicone mat but I can't say if that would be any healthier for you than aluminum foil and you can't wrap up your veggies or potatoes with either of those items.  I also found wood grilling planks that keep your food from sticking and purportedly add flavor which would work great for salmon or the like but again, you certainly can't wrap food in the way you would like to.

There are also options of the stainless steel variety such as grilling baskets for vegetables and you can cover with a dome to help steam them.  You can use stainless steel or cast iron cookware on the grill as long as it is rated for that high of a temperature.  I don't know that there is anything that is going to be as easy as aluminum foil but at least with stainless steel or cast iron you know it is a safer option and it is reusable too.


Do you have a question, comment, or suggestion?
I'd love to hear from you!

Email me at Mrs.Stebber@gmail.com or comment on the blog

Thursday, May 30, 2019

Freezing Mason Jars Like A Pro

I recently had a major malfunction with a poorly executed attempt at freezing mason jars.  Instead of beautifully frozen oat milk, I ended up with oat milk and glass shard surprise.  I managed to cause the untimely demise of four-quart size jars by assuming that I knew what I was doing.  This is my attempt to right my terrible wrong and to make sure these jars did not die in vain.  

First things first.  You must understand that glass can be a fickle b!tch and sometimes, even when you do everything right, (which I did not) it wants to crack and drive you bat sh!t crazy.  Having said that, if you do everything right you can greatly minimize the opportunities for glass to be the aforementioned fickle b!tch.

Step one.  Know your jars.  There are wide mouth and regular mouth.  I was trying to freeze quart size regular mouth jars and I thought it would be okay because I left about an inch of headspace and left the caps off during freezing.  Quart size regular mouth doesn't care about headspace because of the curve between the mouth and the sides of the jar that is known as the shoulders.  It isn't even recommended to freeze quart size jars, wide mouth or regular, but if you are going to do it anyway give at least an inch or so of headspace on a wide mouth jar and don't even dare to freeze a regular mouth quart jar.  

There are some mason jars that are recommended for freezing.  These jars are designed without curved shoulders to allow for easier expansion.  Some are regular mouth and others are wide mouth and they come in a variety of sizes.  You can look at the side of the box of jars and it should have a chart that tells you what is freezer safe and what isn't.  If you don't have a chart, a good rule of thumb is that if the size of the jar is less than a quart and the sides are straight, ie, no shoulders, you should be able to freeze them as long as you leave headspace and either leave caps off during freezing or just put them on very loose.

Step two.  Cool jars go in, cool jars come out.  What I mean by this is that glass can crack when exposed to extremes in temperature.  If you are freezing broth that is still hot or warm in the jar and you put it right into the freezer thinking it will cool in there before freezing, you are wrong.  Remember that glass wants to crack and you need to outsmart it.  You need to cool the jar and the contents completely before you stick that baby in the freezer.  Cool it in the fridge if you want but never in the freezer.  Frozen glass coming out of the freezer should also be treated gently.  Thaw it in the fridge or on the counter but don't try putting that thing in hot water to try and thaw it faster or you'll end up with glass shard surprise.

Well, there you have it.  Straight sides, headspace, cool in and cool out.  Good luck!


Wednesday, May 29, 2019

Weekly Weigh In 5/29/2019

It's the very last weigh-in of the month and the handsome husband rolled a whole bunch of nothing out to the curb.  That's right, zero bags this week.  That brings our total for the month of May to 3 bags and our total for the year to 10 bags.  It's still way more than I'd like but it's progress nonetheless.  

How did you weigh in this week?

"Would you like PAPER or non-biodegradable, petroleum-based, animal-killing, landfill-filling, one-use PLASTIC bags?"

"We're going with guilt instead of a direct ban of plastic bags!"

WTF Wednesday: Smile in the Face of Ignorance

When making changes for the good of the planet, you are going to run into some a**holes.  Some people view change as weird or even comical.  It is neither of those things.  Change is intelligent and courageous.  It takes a special person to change.  You need to educate yourself about the need for change.  You need insight and forethought to prepare for change.  Most importantly, you need courage and dedication to make a change.  It's easy to stick with what is perceived as easy or what is normal.  It takes someone who's willing to be different to pave the way for others to follow.

I mentioned in The Day I Realized I Am a Superhero that people stare at you in amazement when you refuse a bag and carry something with your hand.  It isn't that astonishing, I actually have two of them.  I used to hate it when I still used plastic bags at stores when they would put the stupidest things in bags.  I don't need a gallon of milk in a plastic bag, it has its own handle.  I don't need a watermelon in a bag, that's just dumb.  I also don't need a card in a bag, or any other small item or items.  I don't need each sandwich from Subway in its own bag.  When we first switched to reusable bags (which seems to be embraced by the general population better than no bag at all) I had a checkout boy at Target grumble at me that I could "just get paper" instead of using my own bags.  I'm not sure how paper bags, as opposed to cloth bags, would ease his workload but whatever.  Instead of going off on a rant or being rude, I chose to smile and thank him for bagging my groceries.  

I think it's better to smile in the face of ignorance if you want people to be open-minded and accept change.  You can't force anyone to change but you can be polite and lead by example.

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

Slow Clap Presents: Nine out of Ten Green Sea Turtles Prefer to Lay Eggs on the Tarmac

Real Story.  Real Stupid.

Newly hatched green sea turtle.

Maafaru, an island the Maldives has long been known to be a popular nesting beach location for hundreds of turtles.  This year when a female green turtle returned to lay her eggs on the sandy beach she was faced with a 1.3-mile runway instead.  Normally turtles dig a nest in the sand between 1 and 2 feet deep with their rear flippers to safely bury their clutch but this obviously wasn't possible on the asphalt tarmac.  The turtle left marks on the asphalt from her effort to move across it and people reported that she was able to get back to the water safely.  Locals report that the number of turtles attempting to lay eggs on the beach has not appeared to have declined.  

These turtles will continue to lay their eggs in this same location despite the runway and this will no doubt decrease their population to some degree.  

Green sea turtles are an endangered species.  They are endangered due to being hunted for food, pollution, entanglement in fishing nets, and habitat destruction. 

Green sea turtles can live to be 80 years old in the wild even though only about 1 percent of turtles live to reach sexual maturity which can be anywhere between age 20 and 50 years old.  Adults can reach a length of 5 feet and can weigh between 150 to 400 pounds or more.  They live their life grazing on seagrass in shallow meadows. 

Green sea turtles migrate between feeding grounds and spawning grounds.  They migrate thousands of miles across the ocean to mate.  They do this because they return to the same beach that they hatched to mate and lay their eggs.  Males make this trip each year in an attempt to breed while females do this only every 2 to 4 years.  The reason for this natal homing is because they want to give their offspring the best chance at survival.  They return to the places that have sandy beaches with ideal temperatures that are in close proximity to the water with a lower threat of predators.  What better place to go to than the very spot that provided you all of those things?

My two cents: Why someone would build a 1.3-mile runway along a sandy beach known to be nesting grounds to hundreds of endangered sea turtles is greed plain and simple.  It's truly sad and disturbing to me.  Since the fate of the eggs is unknown, I am left to wonder what happened to them.  Did someone bury them, did someone toss them aside, or were they left to cook in their own shell?  Turtles follow instinct and will continue to lay at this location.  They can't just decide to find a new place instead.  Let's hope the Maafaru International Airport is worth it.  

Rating:  I give the story of endangered eggs on a hot tarmac 4 out of 5 possible slow claps.  Once again, human greed trumps all else.


Green sea turtle laying her eggs on the tarmac.

A closer look.

The 1.3-mile runway in all of its glory.

Monday, May 27, 2019

The Nut Milk bag is the Answer to Your Life's Problems

First Julie told me about oat milk.  Then Julie told me about the nut milk bag.  Julie should write the blog from now on because she is two steps ahead of me and she just started making her own yogurt!  

I'm not ready to tackle yogurt making but I did give the oat milk a try and I've grown to love it.  Making it is even simpler now that I have a nut milk bag of my own.  I ordered it from Amazon (of course) and it came on Sunday.  I was so excited to try it out that I made a big batch of oat milk that same afternoon.

I bought Ellie's Best Bigger Better nut milk bag for 14 dollars.  It's an ultra-fine mesh nylon cheesecloth bag that's easy to use and easy to clean.  It is a larger size bag at 12 by 12 inches.  I made four batches of the oat milk and it went much faster because the bag strains so quickly.  When I was done I just had to take the oat pulp out, turn it inside out and rinse it, and then wash it in soapy water and let it dry before storing it.  

I may try making almond milk or yogurt in the future since this bag has made the process so much easier and faster. 

Random thoughts: Nut milk bag?  I suppose that is the intended use for the bag but there has to be something that sounds a little less...odd.

Check out Ellie's nut milk bags, recipes, and more here.


Sunday, May 26, 2019

Seasonal Sunday: Doggie Dooley

What should you do when Rover drops a deuce?  It's actually recommended in most areas that you pick it up and flush it down the toilet.  That's right, pick it up in toilet paper, carry it into the house, walk through the house with it to the bathroom, then just gently add it to the toilet bowl and flush.  It's just that easy!  

Your garbage company doesn't want it in the trash because of the high level of methane that comes from buried fecal matter.  Composting it isn't an option because the composting process doesn't reach a high enough temperature to kill harmful bacteria that normally exist in this type of waste.  To be clear, you can compost feces that comes from a herbivore.  So if you don't want to flush it, you can't throw it away, and you can't compost it, what should you do?  Good question.  The answer is training Rover to do his business on the toilet a mini septic tank.

Doggie Dooley is just that.  It's a mini septic tank just for Rover.  Imagine how special your fur baby will feel when he sees that you care so much about his waste!  Doggie Dooley is a small unit that is partially buried in your yard that "digests" the waste much like a regular septic tank does.  They come in a few different sizes and shapes.  Depending on the number of dogs you have and their size plus factoring for your soil, you can select the right size and shape for your needs. 

I selected the galvanized steel, model 3000, for our home.  It is recommended for up to 4 small dogs or 2 large dogs.  We currently have a 6 pound Yorkie named Pixel who is quite eager to try our his new Doggie Dooley.  Once Handsome Husband gets it installed and Pixel gets to work on his contribution I'll write an honest review and let you know how it works for us.  I paid for our Doggie Dooley and am in no way compensated for my review.

Arbitrary thoughts:  I love that the logo is a dog smoking a pipe and reading the paper while he takes care of business.  I appreciate the humor of the artist that designed such a fine logo.


Pixel can't wait to try out his very own Doggie Dooley.



Saturday, May 25, 2019

*Mr. Cheeseface


If 
You Don't 
Read This 
Blog, 
I'll Kill This 
Dog


This is Mr. Cheeseface.  He was featured on the cover of National Lampoon magazine in January 1973.  The writers of the magazine were looking to boost sales and it not only worked but became one of the most iconic magazine covers of all time.  Maybe it will boost blog traffic, maybe not.  Either way, it's funny.

Friday, May 24, 2019

Dear Betty: Reader Question 5/24/2019 Sky Lanterns & Balloons Part Dos

Last week I talked about a reader question regarding sky lanterns and balloon releases.  This is part two to that question where I discuss balloons.  You can read the original post here.

A balloon release is much the same as lighting sky lanterns as it is done as a prayer, a memorial, or to mark an occasion.  Releasing balloons into the environment poses many problems.

Helium is a natural atmospheric gas but as a land resource, it is in limited supply.  There have been some record-breaking balloon releases that have served as an epic waste of this finite resource.

Balloons that are released become litter.  They often become tangled in trees and powerlines or fall into areas where animals live and can quickly become an issue.  Some balloons are marketed as "biodegradable" but they are not.  Latex balloons also do not degrade.  It is essentially intentional plastic pollution.

Balloons are the biggest threat to seabirds that mistakingly consume plastic.  Balloons are a threat to marine animals who mistake it for a jellyfish or other meal.  There have been several cases of cattle, horses, and other livestock that have choked to death after ingesting a deflated balloon that has landed in their field.

Since a picture is worth a thousand words, I posted some below that I found on the website Balloons Blow...Don't Let Them Go!  They have a lot of great information as to why you shouldn't release balloons as well as environmentally friendly alternatives.








Do you have a question, comment, or suggestion?
I'd love to hear from you!

Email me at Mrs.Stebber@gmail.com or comment on the blog


Thursday, May 23, 2019

Burt's Bees Face Spooge Some More

I think the title is a bit more creative than if I had just called it Burt's Bees Face Spooge 2.  This is why you read my blog and not other "bland" blogs.  You're welcome.

If you would like to refresh your memory on the original face spooge post click here.

Burt's Bees Soap Bark and Chamomile Deep Cleansing Cream is something new that I decided to try when we ran out of the facial scrub that we tried before.  My reason in trying something different was the price since the cleansing cream is just a bit cheaper.  I wouldn't be buying either of these products if I wasn't part of the free recycling program for Burt's Bees products through TerraCycle.

I really like the soap bark and chamomile deep cleansing cream.  It has a really refreshing scent and it does what its intended purpose is, it cleans my face.  I usually use my charcoal bar on my face but I like to use what I buy for the handsome husband from time to time.  Handsome Husband agrees that this cleansing cream is quite nice but he doesn't like it as much as the scrub that I had bought for him the last time. The element of him desiring a scrub eluded me when I was at the store.  


Arbitrary thoughts: I don't feel like we can discuss chamomile without giving credit where credit is due. Credit must be given to The Lonely Island for their epic lyric from the song The Heist 'Yo, have this cup of tea Man you'll never see those magazines. This tea is delicious, what'd you say it was?  Chamomile, muthafucka.'  I just can't say or think about chamomile with having to think 'chamomile muthafucka.'  If you aren't completely bored or appalled, you can listen to The Heist here.  You're welcome, again.

Burt's Bees Soap Bark and Chamomile deep cleansing cream.

The Lonely Island team, Andy Samberg and those other two guys.


Wednesday, May 22, 2019

Weekly Weigh In 5/22/2019

Today is garbage day and we are sending one bag out to the curb.  We still have one more weekly weigh-in for the month but I'm guessing this will be it for us.  Only time will tell so come back and check next week.  I expect you'll be waiting on pins and needles but that's just the way it has to be.

How did you weigh in this week?


Goodness Glows

I was in need of a liquid foundation and I decided to give Burt's Bees a try since I like several of their other products.  I also like that Burt's Bees uses natural ingredients and you can recycle beauty packaging for free through TerraCycle.  

I spent a lot of time trying to figure out which shade would work for my corpse-like pale skin because I am inept in the beauty department.  That's why this is a less waste blog and not a beauty how to blog.  I chose ivory and even though it is a tad light for me it still works and keeps me looking like a fresh-faced decedent.  I think it goes on nicely and it lasts all day.  I often have reactions to products because I have rather sensitive skin but I have not had any issues with this product.

Burt's Bees Goodness Glows liquid foundation is made without parabens, phthalates, SLS, petrolatum or synthetic fragrances.  I'm not sure what all of those things are but maybe I'll use that for a post another day.  It is dermatologist tested and never tested on animals.  The ingredients are even responsibly sourced. 

So there you have it.  Burt's Bees make a great liquid foundation.

Burt's Bees Goodness Glows is made by real bees.

Tuesday, May 21, 2019

Slow Clap Presents: Love Canal's Lesson in Never Trusting Hookers

Real Story.  Real Stupid.

In 1890 Niagra Falls, New York, Love Canal was designed to be a model community.  It turned out to be anything but a model community and what ensued was one of the biggest chemical waste scandals that would take over 50 years to resolve.

Like I said, our story begins in 1890 with William T. Love.  Mr. Love was an entrepreneur who wanted to build a perfect urban city.  He wanted to use hydroelectricity to lure factories and manufacturers to the area by building a canal.  He was so dedicated to this vision that he gave the project his name which is how Love Canal came to be.  A factory was built and by 1894 work on the canal began.  A few streets and houses soon went up and the future was looking bright.  Steel companies and other manufacturers were eagerly lining up at the chance to open plants along the canal.  Things were prospering and about a mile of the canal had been dug when Congress passed a law that banned water removal from the Niagra River in order to preserve Niagra Falls.  Since Love Canal would draw its water from the Niagra River, the project was shut down.  The shutdown of the canal, advancement in electricity, and investment issues led to a financial end for William T. Love.  His properties and company foreclosed and were sold at auction to the city in 1910.

The canal sat abandoned and eventually filled with water that local children used for swimming in the summer and for skating in the winter.  In 1920 the canal became an official dump site for the city.  It was filled with municipal waste and refuse from the city.  The city continued to blossom with major industries producing paper, rubber, plastic, petrochemicals, carbon insulations, and abrasives.  

Hooker Chemical Company is one such business that flourished during this time and needed a place to dispose of their large quantities of chemical waste.  They were granted permission in 1942 to dispose of this waste in Love Canal and so the canal was drained and lined with thick clay.  Hooker Chemical Company then filled the canal with 55-gallon barrels containing chemicals and toxic waste.  They filled the canal with 21,800 short tons of chemicals such as caustics, alkalines, fatty acids, and chlorinated hydrocarbons that are byproducts from the production of dyes, perfumes, and solvents for rubber and synthetic resin.  In 1947 Hooker Chemical Company purchased the canal and the banks on either side and later converted it back to a dump but this time it became a sprawling 70-acre landfill.

In the 1950s the city of Niagra Falls underwent another population boom and the population swelled.  There was now a need for more neighborhoods and schools.  In 1952 it was apparent that the site would eventually be developed due to the growing population and so the landfill was put out of commission and capped with a thick clay seal to prevent any leaks.  

In 1953 the land was "sold" for $1 to the local school district.  Other local properties had been condemned by the school board and an agreement was made that Hooker Chemical Company would deed the property to the district for $1 and in exchange, they had a lengthy liability clause.  Doing this allowed Hooker Chemical Company to pass the responsibility of the buried waste onto that of someone else, thus protecting themselves from legal liability.

Soon after the sale of the property in 1954, the school board began development on the 99th Street School which breached containment structures and previously sealed chemicals were allowed to escape.  The architect advised the school against continuing this project when some of the 55-gallon barrels were discovered.  Instead of abandoning the project, they decided to move the building site about 80 feet north to avoid the waste.  The kindergarten playground also had to be moved since the original location was on top of the chemical dump.  

The school was completed in 1955 and opened its doors to 400 students.  Shortly after opening, a 25-foot area crumbled and exposed some of the toxic barrels that were buried.  The drums would fill with rainwater and create large puddles that the school children enjoyed playing in.  

The school board had sold the remaining land and it was developed into low income and single family residences next to the landfill site.  Again, the clay liner was broken and chemicals were allowed to escape from the landfill and the canal.  The clay surrounding the waste began to crack and break in other areas as well.  

After a very wet winter in 1962, combined with the previous construction of an expressway that restricted water flow to the Niagra River, the canal became an overflowing pool.  Residents reported having puddles of oil and other colored liquids in their yards and basements.  People began to complain about a mysterious black fluid that drained out of the canal as well as odors and substances that were showing up in their yards and in local playgrounds.  This went on for years until another harsh winter in 1977 that raised the water table to the point that it got into the groundwater and caused dioxin levels to rise until water erupted in resident's yards.  This finally prompted an official investigation.

In the spring of 1977, the official investigation found numerous contaminants in the air, soil, and groundwater.  There was a massive evacuation of the area and the area was later purchased by the federal government through the Superfund Act to help the displaced families. Many of the properties were later demolished and a massive clean up effort ensued that would take from 1978 to 2004 to complete.

This toxic mess has left many people with long-standing health issues and symptoms of high white blood cell count, leukemia, low birth weight babies, birth defects, seizures, learning disabilities, hyperactivity, eye irritation, skin, rashes, abdominal pain, incontinence, stunted growth, increased rate of miscarriages, nervous disorders, and cancer, of course.  

My two cents:  Speechless.  

Rating:  I give the story of Love Canal 3 out of 5 possible slow claps.  So many times this could have been avoided or discovered and people passed the buck or turned a blind eye.  Love Canal is a cautionary tale that can and should be remembered.


If I was this kid's mom, I would have written "Never Trust a Hooker" but that's me.  Get it?  Hooker Chemical Company?  Just read the post.

Monday, May 20, 2019

Lost in Translation

"I don't want to use recycled toilet paper."

I like to listen to WCCO on my drive to and from work each day.  They keep me in the know about what's going on and they splice in a little humor with Beyond the Headlines.  

I was listening recently when they were discussing an article published in The Guardian titled Wiped Out: America's Love of Luxury Toilet Paper is Destroying Canadian Forests.  The article points out that Americans makeup 4 percent of the world's population but accounts for 20 percent of global tissue use.  Major toilet paper brands use virgin wood pulp to make extra soft multi-ply toilet paper because that is what Americans want after decades of successful marketing tactics.

Wood pulp for American toilet paper comes from the boreal forest in Canada.  Since 1996, 28 million acres of the boreal forest has been cut down to keep up with our 25 pounds per year per person habit of toilet paper usage.

Back to the radio show.  One host said to the other that a solution to this problem is to use recycled toilet paper and the other host responded that she would never, ever use recycled toilet paper.  She felt it is disgusting to even consider "recycling toilet paper."  Neither of them realized that 'recycled toilet paper' is completely different than 'recycling toilet paper.'  

Recycled toilet paper comes from recycled paper, you know, regular paper.  There is no reason that toilet paper needs to be made solely from virgin wood pulp when it can easily be made from recycled paper.  Some toilet paper is even made from bamboo which is more sustainable than wood.  

So where can you get recycled toilet paper?  The best option is through Who Gives a Crap but you can also buy it in store and look for Seventh Generation and Natural Value.  

Now you know what recycled toilet paper is and you don't have to worry that anything has been lost in translation.  You're welcome. 

Trees cut down in the boreal forest.

Sunday, May 19, 2019

Seasonal Sunday: How to Harden Off your Seedlings

The process of turning a weak pussy seedling into a big tough beefcake plant is known as "hardening off."  Hardening off your seedlings prepares them for their new life outdoors.  I've skipped this process and let me tell you that was a huge mistake.  There is little more frustrating than pouring your heart and soul into seedlings and have them shrivel up and die before they have had the chance to fulfill their life's purpose.  This is why you read my blog, to learn from my stupid mistakes.  

Hardening off your seedlings takes time.  Plan to spend at least a week to 10 days, or more acclimating them into the wild outdoors. Whipping your seedlings into big strong plants is easiest explained in three phases.  We shall call this process "Operation Christian Bale," or OCB for short.

OCB Phase 1.  Place your seedlings outdoors for an hour or two at a time.  Plants should be watered well before you place them outside and they should be placed in the shade with no wind.  You can gradually increase the time outside each day by another hour or two.

OCB Phase 2.  You can now have your seedlings outdoors for several hours each day.  Keep increasing that time outdoors by an hour or two each day.  They are still being set in the shade at this point.  Water your plants a bit less before you put them outside so that the soil is damp but not dry.

OCB Phase 3.  Start putting the seedlings in the sun for an hour or two each day as well as the shade for the rest of the time outside.  Keep an eye on the leaves to make sure the sun isn't drying them out too much or bleaching spots.  Keep the soil moist to dry and keep bringing them inside at night.  You can go ahead and plant your beefcake seedlings in the garden when they seem ready and the overnight temp is above 40 degrees.

Hardening off seedlings can be done differently depending on where you live and how the weather is each particular year.  You can do what works best for you but this is a general guide for you to get started.  Too many times I've done it wrong or too fast and ended up with dead withered plants.  Slower is better during Operation Christian Bale.

Christian Bale before and after hardening off.

Saturday, May 18, 2019

*Mama Betty's Bottled Water

Mama Betty's test kitchen staff and our team of water sommeliers are proud to announce a new line of bottled water!  Rest assured this bottled water is not like any other bottled water that you have tried.  Mama Betty's bottled water is delicious, refreshing, and filling.  You don't have to take our word for it, check out our testimonials below! 

Everything about our bottled water is different, from the taste and texture to the shape of the bottle.  We promise you're going to love it from the first sip to the last chew. 

Our water is bottled at the source, which is the beautiful Citarum River.  The Citarum River is the longest and largest river nestled in West Java, Indonesia.  The river is robust and filled with an endless supply of excellent bacteria that will improve your health exponentially.  Staff at Mama Betty's wholeheartedly believe that whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 

Mama Betty's bottled water is never purified or treated in any way.  We believe water should be consumed in its most natural form, the way Mother Nature intended.  Without all of the unnecessary treatment, you will find that our water has much more flavor than that of other brands of bottled water.  

Our water will help curb your appetite naturally.  Our water retains much of the naturally occurring sediment that is packed with nutrients and good belly bugs that will help fill you up.  Since we want you to stay full, each bottle has more microplastic than any other bottled water on the market.  Between the sediment and microplastic, you will be able to curb your appetite for hours.  In fact, you can use Mama Betty's bottled water as a meal replacement if you are dieting.  Our water is so thick, you might just have to chew it.  For this reason, we recommend shaking the bottle vigorously between each refreshing gulp.

Because we care about your health, we only use virgin plastic for our bottles and microplastic additives.  We know how frustrating it is to drink out of a flimsy bottle so we designed ours to be extra thick.  We also took into consideration how frustrating spills can be so we created a special non-tip base.  Just go ahead and try to knock over a bottle of Mama Betty's, you can't!  We also considered the extra weight of the bottle that is a result of the extra thick plastic and extra thick water, we created an ergonomic grip that will feel nice and meaty in the palm of your hand.  The bottle itself is completed with a sippy top so that you don't have to waste time fiddling with a screw cap.  

You can surely see that all of us at Mama Betty's have thought of everything.  We are proud to be creating jobs in an area where work is in need.  We know you are going to love our bottled water and we stand by our product with a money back guarantee.  

Testimonials:

When I first tried Mama Betty's bottled water, I thought I was choking but I got it down and was full for three days.  I've never looked so thin!  Thanks for giving me my hot new bod! -Jessica

My husband and I just love the ergonomic shape of the bottles.  We seem to get thirsty just looking at the bottle and I'm not sure why.  Maybe it's just because the water is so delicious. -Brad

My doctor told me I got the worst case of food poisoning he's seen in his entire career.  It's the best thing that ever happened to me because now I look like Victoria's Secret model.  I told all my girlfriends to drink this stuff and they had similar results. 
-Genevieve 

Disclaimer:

Consume Mama Betty's bottled water at your own risk.  Drinking Mama Betty's bottled water can cause serious health issues.  Health issues can include but are not limited to food poisoning, explosive diarrhea, headache, nausea and vomiting, hallucinations, desire to grip random objects, permanent gag reflex syndrome, lust for goats, pica, or mild to moderate hair loss.

Here is one of our proud bottlers.  She makes sure to get the bottle low in the water to maximize the amount of delicious sediment in each and every bottle.

A refreshing bottle of Mama Betty's bottled water.

*Satirical Saturday brought to you by Betty.

Friday, May 17, 2019

Dear Betty: Reader Question 5/17/2019 Sky Lanterns and Balloons Part Uno

Dear Betty,
I was at an event recently where sky lanterns were released.  They looked beautiful but I wondered if they are harmful to the environment?  People also release balloons, is that harmful to the environment?
Thank you,
Tracy

Dear Tracy,
Thank you for the questions and thank you for reading!  I looked into the sky lanterns and balloons and found some interesting information.  I'll answer the sky lantern question this week and balloons next week. 
Thanks,
Betty

The use of sky lanterns is a tradition that dates back centuries.  They are also known as Kongming lanterns, Chinese lanterns, sky candles, and fire balloons.  They are made from paper and resemble a hot air balloon.

The design is simple and lightweight.  The body is thin paper and the frame is usually a thin metal wire but is sometimes made of rope or bamboo.  There is a thick collar around the opening that serves to keep the flame away from the paper.  When the candle or flammable waxy material is lit, it heats the inside of the lantern and lowers its density.  When it is less dense than that of the surrounding air, the lantern will rise up into the air.  Once the heat source is burned out the lantern will fall back to the ground.  They are promoted as being biodegradable because the paper will degrade and the metal frame will eventually rust away.

Issues with the lanterns are that of the obvious fire hazard and the less obvious danger to animals.  The lanterns can land while the flame is still lit or can start on fire while in the sky if it gets tipped and the flame is exposed to the sides.  It can easily be tipped by wind or by bumping into objects in the sky like trees, buildings, or other structures.  There have been some large fires started because of sky lanterns.  The lantern itself is a danger to animals since they can ingest the wireframe pieces as it rusts away. 

My two cents:  I personally wouldn't use or recommend sky lanterns.  Maybe I'm just no fun at all but it seems a rather risky contraption.  It's sort of like lighting your litter on fire before actually littering it. 



Do you have a question, comment, or suggestion?
I'd love to hear from you!

Email me at Mrs.Stebber@gmail.com or comment on the blog



Thursday, May 16, 2019

Save Money (and the Planet too) on Your Fancy Yuppie Coffee

Switching to reusable items saves a lot of money, I've made that point in abundance on this blog, but did you know that you can save money on your drink every time you go to Starbucks or Caribou?

I don't personally patronize either establishment but the Handsome Husband loves himself some Caribou.  He likes the caramel cooler with two pumps of caramel without whip cream on top.  He gets his caramel cooler a few times a week and has a habit of whipping the straw around in the cup for several seconds before he takes each sip.  Each sip must be properly whipped to mix up the ice to a state of perfection.  This habit was once a source of annoyance for the rest of the family but has blossomed into a rich source of humor within our home.  I'm not making fun mind you, I love my husband dearly, and I am by far the most annoying person that I know.

Last year we made the switch to reusable straws to reduce that waste and Handsome Husband has been great about bringing his straw with him when he gets his yuppie slushie caramel cooler.  He noticed that his plastic Caribou cups were aplenty in our recycling bin and he decided to get a reusable cup to eliminate that waste as well.  He bought a 20-ounce Yeti tumbler with a straw lid and has been using it ever since.  He saves 10 cents each time on his drink and eventually the tumbler will have paid for itself.

There you have it.  Save money on your mocha-lotta-chottas you fancy freaking yuppies.  You're welcome.  

Bill Murray's solution to the "disposable" cup.

The Grasshopper Bundt, as Promised

I promised to post the grasshopper bundt recipe and I am making good on that promise today.  Regrettfully, the recipe is not my creation bu...