Your Soda Bottles Suck Too

We all know by now that bottled water is a monumental waste of plastic.  What about your cheap two liters and handy 20-ounce bottles that you grab at the checkout?  You probably saw this coming, but those are just as bad.  

To be clear, I am in no way suggesting that you give up pop.  Coke Zero Sugar is of paramount importance as a staple in my life and I will never give it up.  I opt for a slightly more responsible approach as a dedicated consumer of the aforementioned bubbly goodness.  I buy it in cans, the way nature intended.  Aluminum is infinitely recyclable and retains its value and integrity 100%.  Since I need Coke Zero Sugar like a diabetic needs their insulin, buying it in cans is the most responsible option.  If you can't give up pop, I suggest you do the same.

Here come the fun facts!  Globally, one million plastic bottles are sold per minute.  This is not limited to just pop bottles but it is important nonetheless.  Coca-Cola uses only 7% of recycled plastic in the production of their bottles.  Nestle Waters uses only 6% of recycled plastic in the production of their bottles.  Pepsico would not divulge a percentage but stated that they used 139 million pounds of recycled plastic in 2015.

Considering that 91% of all plastic is not recycled, make the switch to cans. 

Discarded pop bottles in their natural habitat.

Weekly Weigh In 2/27/2019

February trash finally caught up with us and the handsome husband put out one bag.  Not too shabby all things considered.  That brings our total for February to 1.25 bags, and the total for the year so far to 4.25 bags. 

How did you weigh in this week?

Fuffernutter

by Mitra Farmand

WTF Wednesday: Respect Others, Asshole

I've found that as people make changes, it seems to be a source of humor or criticism for others.  I've received a fair amount of snark from other people for the changes that my family and I have made.  What I don't know is why.

We currently live in a social and political climate that demands that we accept one another, yet we constantly call each other out for the smallest infractions.  We are a society that is so easily offended but steadfast in our ability to quickly dole out insults.  How can we survive and grow as human beings when we live in an increasingly oxymoronic society?

We are so busy feeling offended and squabbling over arbitrary non-issues that we have lost focus of what really needs attention.  Why is everything so offensive anyway?  I feel that people who are easily offended are weak of mind and not secure in their beliefs.  Everyone gets offended from time to time, that's not what I'm talking about.  People are offended simply by the opinions of others.  Are we no longer able to have an opinion or be a free thinker?   

We need to pull together and take care of mankind.  We need to take care of our planet before we have no place to live.  If a dog is smart enough not to sh!t where it eats or sleeps, we should be smart enough not to sh!t all over the only place we have to live.

Most people are looking out for themselves and no one else.  Society tells us we need more money, more possessions, more, more, more of everything.  We need it, we deserve it, we earned it.  We live in a time of excess and we usually don't need it, don't deserve it, and often haven't earned it.  What we really need is less.  Less material items, less spending, less attitude, and less insults.

I feel that for the most part, I respect what other people think and believe.  Having said that, I also make fun of just about everyone and everything, including myself.  Life is better when you can make a joke and laugh a little without being offended or offending anyone else.

When other people make changes, try asking yourself if that is something good that you should do as well.  Try toughening up a little bit, respect others, and try not to be an asshole.

Slow Clap Presents: Flick My BIC

Real Story.  Real Stupid.

The BIC disposable lighter hit the market in 1973.  It quickly became the leading brand for disposable lighters and continues to be today.  

Each year in the U.S. 1 billion BIC lighters are sold.  The majority, 700 million are imported, and of that 700 million, 400 million are imported from China.  Each day, world wide, 6 million lighters are purchased.  When the BIC lighter celebrated it's 40th birthday, in 2013, they had sold over 30 billion lighters.

BIC disposable lighters are made from steel, aluminum, and a plastic known as delrin.  Delrin is polyoxymethylene, also known as POM.  Polyoxymethylene is created from the polymerization of formaldehyde.  Each standard sized pocket lighter holds 4.9 grams of pure isobutane that can produce approximately 3,000 lights.

BIC disposable lighters are very difficult to refill and it is not advised by the company.  They cannot be recycled due to their expertly solid design.  The various materials would need to be separated first and that is difficult because they are intentionally built strong as a safety feature.  Even if the materials are successfully separated, they are too small to go into curbside recycling bins.  They shouldn't be burned or incinerated as the polyoxymethylene releases formaldehyde gas. 

Disposable lighters are a commonly littered item.  When they don't make it to the landfill, they find their way into our water systems.  The saltwater and exposure to sunlight will cause the plastic to photodegrade and it will break down into microplastic.  Lighters are commonly mistaken for food by Albatross.  Albatross are surface feeders which means they eat by swooping close to the water and scooping up squid and fish near the surface.  Now that plastic pollution has become so abundant, they mistakenly scoop up plastic instead of food.  Since baby albatross rely on this scooped up food for survival, they are mistakenly being fed plastic.  Disposable lighters are found in abundance inside of deceased baby albatross.  It is estimated that 1 million sea birds die each year as a direct result of ingesting plastic.

Instead of a "disposable" lighter, try something that doesn't pollute the planet and kill sea birds and marine animals.  Matches are an excellent option, as is a reusable lighter.  Zippo offers a variety of refillable lighters that look infinitely more badass than a plastic piece of sh!t.  You can even get a rechargeable plasma lighter or electric arc lighter that would be zero waste.  

My two cents:  People can't change their behavior until they are educated about an issue.  Here is your chance.  Make a change and inform others to do the same.  Animals shouldn't have to die because we are negligent assholes.

Rating:  I'm giving Flick My BIC four out of five possible slow claps.  Pollution and death is a direct result of the "disposable" lighter.  Products that are the direct cause of animal pain, suffering, and death will always be rated higher.

A healthy baby albatross with a tummy full of delicious disposable lighters.

Lunds and Byerlys Cares (a little)

I like to ramble about companies and products that I like.  Lunds and Byerlys are deserving of my props.  While I must first admit that Lunds and Byerlys is a trash mongering, overpriced, grocery store for snobs, they are also making a small effort to do some things right.  Unlike other stores who give no shits and shall not be named.  Just kidding, I mean Walmart. 

So why is Lunds and Byerlys deserving of my much-coveted props?  

When you walk in the door they have bins to recycle cans and regular plastic.  They also have a bin for soft plastic, also known as plastic film.  Plastic film is your different bags and packaging material that is not accepted by municipal curbside recycling.  

If you head back to their eating area they have more recycling bins as well as a compost receptacle.  They have detailed signage to ensure that the right things go into the right bins.  The signage warms my heart as most people think they know a lot about recycling but actually know very little.  It has to go into the right place to matter bruh.  

Lunds and Byerlys has a mouth-watering salad bar.  I usually avoid it because it costs so darn much and because they have plastic salad containers.  When I do fall victim to temptation, I take comfort in knowing that their plastic salad containers are made from recycled bottles.  It isn't the best option but its better than nothing.

If you use the bathroom at Lunds and Byerlys, you will notice that the bin you toss your paper towel is labeled "compost."  Glorious.  An energy efficient hand dryer would be better but still a step in the right direction.

When you can't find what you need at Target, give Lunds and Byerlys your business because they care...a little.  That's more than that other store that shall not be named.  (I mean Walmart again.)

Compost, Recycle, Waste

Plastic bag recycling center

Seasonal Sunday: How Does Your Garden Grow?

Gardening is a culmination of most things I loathe.  Being outside, touching dirt, bugs, to name a few.  In a strange twist of fate, I love it, even though it has so many attributes of despised things.  There is something inherently satisfying and rewarding found in gardening, and it has become a big part of my family's life.  

I'll cover more gardening when the time is perhaps more appropriate, but for now, we need to be thinking ahead.  You should be thinking about what you want to grow and where it is going to grow.  

Since 2014 I've kept a composition notebook with a diagram of each year's garden and notes for that year.  This way I am able to easily remember where I have planted things from one year to the next since many crops must be rotated.  I usually make notes about when I planted, when the first harvest of each item was, and how that year did.  If I try a remedy for a particular problem I document that and whether or not it worked.  I am not a very good gardener and this helps me learn from my mistakes and hopefully do better the next year.  Sometimes I am lucky and everything goes to plan, other years it is a crap shoot and an utter disaster.  Last year was the latter, the weather was crap and it was one of our worst years.

We have four garden boxes that the handsome husband built.  Each one is 4 feet by 12 feet.  I also have a sunny area below our deck that I utilize some years.  I like to start everything that I can from seed.  It feels like I've accomplished more this way.  It feels like a more wholesome and fulfilling process to me when you start with seeds and end with (hopefully) an abundance of fruits and vegetables.  

I prefer to order my seeds from Seed Savers Exchange.  I feel like my garden has done best with their seeds, although it probably has nothing to do with it.  Whatever works right?  I placed my order back in December because that's how I roll.  

This year I will be growing the following:

Adelaide carrots

Amish Paste tomatoes 

Aunt Mae's Bibb lettuce

Beefsteak tomatoes

Brandywine tomatoes

Cargo PMR pumpkins

Cherry tomatoes, large

Cuccumber, baby

Delicata squash

Dragon carrots

Dragon's Tongue bush beans

Green Peppers

Provider bush beans

Roma tomatoes

Spinach

Traveler jalapeno

Yellow of Parma onions

Yukon Gold potatoes

Zucchini, regular

*Celebrity Interview Featuring Larry David

Anyone who knows me knows that I love Larry David. That's right, I LOVE LARRY DAVID! He had me at "I own one pair of underwear, that’s it!" He was on Saturday Night Live, impersonating Bernie Sanders. My life was forever changed. From that moment on, it was a slippery slope into the hilarious abyss of comedic genius that is Larry David. His overly analytical perception of the smallest intricacies of everyday life speaks to the deepest parts of my soul. I, too, analyze and ruminate over the smallest of things. I'm a deep thinker with a dry and colorful sense of humor. Imagine the joy I felt when I found out I was going to interview the brains behind Curb Your Enthusiasm! Be still my heart. This is it!

Through Larry's agent, we were able to agree upon a locus equidistant of points. I had my heart set on Leo's and he begrudgingly agreed. Curb fans know why I chose Leo's. 

Finally, the day arrived and I headed to Leo's. I get there and the place is empty, except for Leo and Larry. Leo greets me enthusiastically and ushers me to the table that Larry is sitting at. Larry stands up, shakes my hand, and offers me a seat. We exchange the usual pleasantries and introductions. I sit down and stare at him for a moment. I can't believe I'm sitting at the same table as Larry David. I notice that he has on a navy pair of Simple shoes. I blush. He is so adorable. 

LD: Do you want to take a look at the menu? 

Me: No, I know what I want. 

Larry motions for Leo and he comes over right away. 

Leo: What can I get for you? 

LD: Just give me a tuna sandwich. No blandishments, just the tuna. 

Leo looks at me. 

I feel my face get hot because I'm embarrassed. 

Me: I'd like the Larry David sandwich, please. 

LD: What? You don't want that. It's disgusting. You should get something else. 

Me: I'd really like the Larry David sandwich. 

LD: WHY? Do you know what's on that thing? 

Leo: It's a lovely whitefish and sable on rye. 

LD: Whitefish and sable don't even belong together. Just get something else. Anything else. Get the Ted Danson at least! 

Leo: Whitefish and sable are beautiful together, there's also capers, onions, and cream cheese. Did I mention it's on rye bread? 

I feel ridiculous. I knew this was going to happen. Larry hates his sandwich. 

Me: I'll stick with the Larry David sandwich, please. 

Leo smiles. Larry throws up his hands in disgust. 

LD: It's terrible, it nearly killed my father you know! 

Me: I don't even like fish. I just want to have the Larry David, with Larry David, at Leo's. 

Leo smiles. Larry laughs. 

LD: Suit yourself. 

Leo goes to the kitchen to make our sandwiches. I look around and notice that there is still no one else here. 

Me: Where is everyone? 

LD: Leo lets me have the place to myself when I ask. Keeps me safe from the ineptitude of society. 

Me: I'm impressed. People watching is fun though. 

LD: So tell me about this blog of yours. 

Me: It's just a little something that helps people be less wasteful and live a simpler life that's more fulfilling. I try to add a little humor here and there. 

LD: Sounds interesting enough. I have to admit I haven't read it. Do you get a lot of readers? 

I stare at Larry. I'm frozen. I was hoping this wouldn't be asked. 

LD: I said you get a lot of readers? 

Me: Um 

Larry laughs. 

LD: Come on now, how many readers do you have? 

Me: I'd rather not say. It's a new blog, these things take time. 

LD: Scratch your ear if you have less than 10,000 readers per day. 

I scratch my ear. 

LD: Touch your hair if you have less than 5,000 readers per day. 

I run my fingers through my long hair. 

LD: Move your seat if you have less than 1,000 readers per day. 

Me: I don't want to do this. 

Larry laughs. 

LD: Come on, it's funny. 

I scoot my chair a bit closer to the table. 

LD: What? No way. 

I roll my eyes. I'm so embarrassed. 

LD: Okay, adjust your necklace if it's less than 500 readers per day. 

I don't move. 

LD: 500 readers per day isn't bad for a new blog I bet. 

I sigh and gently adjust my necklace. 

LD: What?!? Less than 500 readers per day. 

Larry laughs again. I can't help but laugh a little when he does. 

LD: Put your finger in your nose if you have under 100 readers per day. 

I take my middle finger and put it in my nose. 

Larry laughs. 

LD: You're giving me the finger? Your abysmally low blog traffic isn't my fault. 

Me: Can we talk about the blog?

LD: As soon as we get to the bottom of this. Clear your throat if you have less than 50 readers per day. 

I clear my throat. 

At that moment Leo comes out of the back with a tray. He gives us each our plated sandwiches and asks us if we want anything to drink besides water. We both say water is fine. 

LD: Now look at this tuna sandwich. Nothing more, nothing less. Tuna can hold its own any day of the week. I love tuna. In fact, I must say it's pretty, pretty, pretty good. 

I look at my Larry David sandwich. He was right, it looks disgusting. I hate fish. Who can pass up a Larry David Sandwich with Larry David though? Maybe I can just nibble the crust or something. 

LD: I see you staring at that garbage on your plate. Don't say I didn't warn you. Even the Mel Brooks would be better than that and the Mel Brooks is liverwurst and egg salad! 

I laugh. The Mel Brooks sounds worse. 

LD: Poke that gross sandwich with your finger if you have less than 25 readers per day. 

I poke the sandwich. 

LD: Poke it again if it's less than 10. 

I poke the sandwich. Larry is cracking himself up. 

Me: Are we done now? 

LD: One more. Take a bite of that sandwich if you have less than 5 readers per day. 

I make a lugubrious face at Larry. 

LD: So less than 10 and more than 5? 

I sigh and take a bite of the sandwich. 

LD: Wow. Less than 5. You poor thing. 

I'm trying to swallow the bite I took and it just won't go down. I can breathe but not well and it is stuck. 

LD: What's wrong? Too gross to eat? 

Larry stares at me for a second. 

LD: What the fuck? LEO! 

Leo comes running out. 

LD: Call an ambulance! This poor girl is choking on your shitty sandwich. 

I'm not really choking so much as my throat is tight. I think I'm having an allergic reaction. I must be allergic to the fish! 

Larry and Leo argue over the sandwich as we wait for the ambulance. I think they forgot about me. Leo argues that people love the sandwich and that Larry is lucky to even have a sandwich named after him. Larry argues that no one in the right mind would enjoy a whitefish and sable sandwich. 

The ambulance arrives and they are loading me into the back. Two paramedics are asking me questions and working in a flurry of activity. Right before they shut the doors Larry yells at me. 

LD: I told you-you should have ordered the Ted Danson!!!

Larry David

*Satirical Saturday brought to you by Betty

Dear Betty Warns Against Too Much Too Fast 2/22/2019

I enjoy hearing about the changes people have made and I like hearing about new ideas people have for me.  I recently was talking with someone who had given up plastic.  They were no longer eating or drinking anything that had been in contact with plastic. 

I admire this endeavor and applaud the dedication it would take to accomplish this monumental feat.  I just don't see it being something that is sustainable at this point in time.  I once tried to give up sugar that didn't come in its natural form such as fruit.  I quickly learned that sugar is in everything.  They add sugar into the strangest places.  I looked at the ingredients list for a sausage once and it had corn syrup added to it.   I must admit that I don't know a great deal about meat production but it doesn't seem logical that corn syrup should be in there. 

Plastic is like sugar in that it is everywhere, and in places you wouldn't expect, or it shouldn't be.  Plastic has polluted our lives and environment in more ways than most people can imagine.  Plastic is a toxin, a carcinogen, and a known endocrine disruptor.  While we need plastic in some applications, we do not need it in its current capacity.  We all need to give up our plastic addiction.

If you can give up plastic cold turkey, I admire your dedication and commitment.  If you are like me, you should see about this task slowly.  I have found that transitioning is easier when you do it slowly and one product at a time.  Changes made slowly are more likely to become habit and thus continue.  For most people, quick, drastic changes can't be sustained.  Slow and steady wins the race, don't do too much too fast.

Try switching from plastic storage containers to glass.  Get a reusable water bottle and give up plastic bottled water.  Get a reusable straw and give up plastic disposable straws.  

Do you have a question, comment, or suggestion?

I'd love to hear from you!

Email me at Mrs.Stebber@gmail.com or comment on the blog
 

Bakelite: The Beginning of Plastic as We Know It

In 1924, Time Magazine called Bakelite a "material of a thousand uses" and correctly predicted it would one-day makeup nearly everything we touch, see, and use.

Bakelite is the very first synthetic plastic.  There was plastic before Bakelite but those were only partially synthetic.   Celluloid and Galalith are partially synthetic plastics, made primarily from plant cellulose and milk protein, respectively.  Bakelite is created from phenol and formaldehyde.  It was created in 1907 by a Belgian chemist Leo Baekeland.  

Bakelite was a revolution.  It was sought after for its resistance to heat and inability to conduct electricity.  Bakelite could be made with ease compared to other materials at the time.  Due to the ease and speed of the manufacturing process,  production costs dropped, and more people could afford things like telephones and radios in their homes.

By 1912, billiard balls were being made from Bakelite because it offered a look, feel, and sound that was comparable to ivory.  By WWI Bakelite was being used for electrical systems, propellers, and the Liberty motor.  It was used for the auto industry, for appliance castings, and buttons.  Coco Chanel started making Bakelite costume jewelry in the early 1920s that became extremely popular.  By the 1930s, game pieces like chess, poker chips, and dominoes were all made from Bakelite.  Bakelite made its way into the kitchen and was molded into all sorts of kitchenware.  During WWII it was used for everything from goggles to field phones.  It served as a metal substitute in firearms for magazines, grips, hand guards, and buttstocks.  In 1943 it was considered as a possible material for one cent coins due to a shortage in the traditional material, although the US Mint ultimately decided on zinc coated steel.  As the 1940s came to a close, Bakelite was beginning to be replaced with newer plastics that were cheaper and easier to produce.

Bakelite possessed many of the same problems that modern plastic does.  It does not biodegrade and there are health risks associated with Bakelite.  Bakelite is made from formaldehyde and often contains asbestos.  It, as is all other plastic, is considered a carcinogen and endocrine disruptor.  

Weekly Weigh In 2/20/2019

I'm not sure how we did it, but we have zero bags of garbage this week!  We are in the middle of a winter storm, so it was nice the handsome husband didn't have to roll anything out.  Good job Stebber family!

How did you weigh in this week?

Beetle Bailey

The scoop on Loop

All my bruhs know how much I like TerraCycle.  Just when we all thought TerraCycle couldn't get any better, they totally outdo themselves!

Have you ever found yourself rinsing out a container to be recycled and wondered why it couldn't just be cleaned and reused?  

I remember a time when I was a kid that my dad would get reusable milk jugs from Cub.  He would pay a small deposit when he purchased the milk and when he brought back the container on our next shopping trip, he would return the jug and get his deposit back.  The milk jug was a thick plastic that was sanitized and reused.  I thought my dad was just cheap at the time because that milk was a few cents cheaper.  Turns out dear old dad was frugal and cared about the environment.

Loop is the brainchild of TerraCycle founder Tom Szaky.  Loop is the same premise as the milk jugs, except it is delivered to your door.  The products are contained in glass or stainless steel and require a deposit that is refunded when you return the container.  The container is sanitized and reused.  

Loop is kicking off this year and if enough people support it, it can grow and make a real difference.  If the idea takes off maybe it could be implemented in stores as well as home delivery.

Want to sign up for the Loop waiting list?  Click here.

Want to learn more about Loop?  Click here.

Loop, in all of its glory.

Slow Clap Presents: Factory Chicken

Real Story.  Real Stupid

Factory Chickens Demand an Appetizer of Arsenic

I touched a little bit on factory chicken in Vital Farms Presents: The Incredible, Edible Egg.  That post was primarily to talk about hens and chickens that lay eggs.  Today we are going to touch more on the factory chicken topic as a whole.

The chicken you buy at the store is known as a broiler chicken.  Technically speaking the term "broiler" refers to any kind of chicken that is specifically raised for its meat.  Broiler chickens are usually your classic white feathered chicken with yellow feet.  

Factory broiler chickens are housed in large shed-type outbuildings that accommodate 20,000 birds.  They are fed a genetically modified corn and soy mixture that contains antibiotics and arsenic.  Arsenic is toxic to humans and can be fatal, but in chickens, it stimulates growth and gives their meat that distinct pinkish color that is sought after in the grocery store.  The terrible diet results in nutritionally deficient birds that are less healthy for human consumption.  

Broiler chickens grow 65% faster under the care of chicken growers than they would grow in nature.  A great deal of work has been put into making these chickens as fat as possible, in the shortest amount of time possible.  They grow so heavy, so fast, that their bones cannot support their unnatural weight.  Walking issues are common among broiler chickens with as many 30 percent not being able to walk at all, and as many as 80 percent suffering from some degree of gait abnormality.

Each year the U.S. slaughters 9 billion chickens for meat consumption, compared to 580 million in the 1950s.  Slaughter plants have become faster and more efficient to keep up with this demand, slaughtering at an impressive rate of 140 chickens per hour.  In the last 50 years, daily meat consumption has increased by 300 percent.  Today factory broiler chickens reach their slaughter weight between 38 and 42 days old.  They reportedly still "peep" at this tender age despite their grossly disproportionate adult appearance.  They are after all, still just chicks.  In the 1950s chickens reached their slaughter weigh no sooner than 63 days, by the 1990's they started reaching their slaughter weight at the current standard, on only half the feed.  

Companies are allowed to use meaningless terms to sell eggs and chicken meat.  Farm fresh, all natural, and hormone free mean absolutely nothing.  Factory chicken doesn't need extra hormones to get too fat to stand up. 

So why has factory chicken become this way?  Supply and demand by us, the consumers.  Every time we pick the cheap eggs or meat, we are perpetuating this unethical and  unhealthy practice.  If it doesn't bother you, keep buying the cheap eggs and meat.  If it does bother you, pay a little more for eggs and meat that came from healthy chickens that were treated humanely.

So what do the terms mean?  

"Conventional" is a meat chicken that never goes outside. It lives in the outbuildings that were described above.  A conventional egg chicken spends its life in a battery cage that is inside of a warehouse or outbuilding.  

"Vegetarian fed" is what most chickens are fed anyway, the GMO corn and soy feed.  Chickens are naturally omnivores and prefer a more diverse diet.  

"Cage-free" just means they are kept in a building where they are free to roam, meat chickens already live this way and the term is really just to get your attention and charge a little more.  Cage-free chickens never go outside, nor see the light of day.  

"Free range" are chickens that have access to the outdoors, or maybe a slab that they can venture out on.  It doesn't mean that they actually are allowed to go outside.  

"Organic" chickens are fed an organic diet that is free of pesticides.  They have outdoor access, but like the free range and cage free birds, they may not actually be able to go outside.  

"Pasture-raised" chickens are allowed to roam outdoors and have plenty of room to peck and stretch their wings.              

My two cents:  I like chicken, but not like this.  How much of this meat ends up in the trash?  I didn't even touch on everything that goes on with these poor animals.  It is an utter disgrace to mankind to treat any animal this way, it shouldn't matter if they are destined for your plate or not.

Rating:  I'm giving factory chicken five out of five possible slow claps.  Animal cruelty really pisses me off.  

Sanitary VS Unsanitary: Landfills Keep Your Food Fresh

I promised to explain the difference between a sanitary and an unsanitary landfill.  Here it is, your second wish is granted!

The landfill is the oldest method of waste disposal.  The concept has evolved over time but the basic principals remain the same. 

There are two types of landfills, sanitary and unsanitary.  The former is the most modern evolution of the landfill and is the new standard in waste burial.

Before the Solid Waste Disposal Act of 1965, landfills were little more than a hole in the ground that anything and everything was dumped in.  There are obvious problems with the unsanitary landfill.  One issue is the leaking of fluids and chemicals into the surrounding soil and water systems.  This process is known as leachate.  Leachate can be toxic and is very harmful to humans and wildlife.  Another issue is the production of methane gas.  Old style landfills were dangerous because methane is unstable and highly flammable.  Landfills were prone to fires and explosions.  The problem with landfills, old and new, is that things don't degrade.  To be fair, things do degrade, albeit slowly and only to a certain extent.  Landfills serve as more of a sarcophagus of sorts for our waste.  Archaeologist William Rathje once uncovered a bowl of guacamole that still had chunks of avocado in it and looked fresh despite being buried for 25 years.    

Modern, or sanitary, landfills are much more advanced than their early predecessor.  To be considered "sanitary," a landfill must meet four requirements set forth by the Environmental Protection Agency.  The first requirement is 'full or partial hydrogeological isolation.'  This means that you can't have leachate leaking all over the place.  You must have a plastic liner and/or you must to have your landfill in a place where leachate can't gain access to soil or water systems utilized by humans.  The second requirement is 'formal engineering preparations.'  This, in the simplest of terms, means that there is an intricate piping system in place to vent the methane gas that is produced and there is a monitoring system in place.  The third requirement is 'permanent control staff on site to oversee and maintain.'  This is exactly what it sounds like. Someone needs to monitor this heaping pile of gas and garbage to make sure the sh!t doesn't hit the fan.  Landfills need to be monitored for at least 30 years after they close due to the continued production of methane.  The fourth requirement is 'planned waste emplacement and covering.'  This is also self-explanatory.  They no longer dump sh!t all over the place.  There is a precise system of cells in place where trash is compacted and placed.  This is all documented and cataloged.  This is how they were able to find the old Atari games buried in the Alamogordo dump thirty years later.  The covering part is in regards to a layer of soil or other cover that must be placed on top of the cells each day.  This helps keep birds, rodents, and other riffraff at bay.

Well, there you have it.  It's everything you wanted to know but were afraid to ask about sanitary and unsanitary landfills.  You're welcome.

You want to read more about the guacamole, don't you?  You got it.  Click here.

Seasonal Sunday: Cleaning Out Your Bathroom Products

If you have been following along on our organization theme for Seasonal Sunday, you may be wondering what you can do to make your bathroom a place of zen.  As with every other area of your home, less is going to be more.

Bathroom products can multiply on their own if given the chance.  I like to only buy products that I've used and am committed to.  Otherwise, you end up with your bathroom full of products that you tried, didn't like, won't use, but don't want to toss because you spent good money on them.  The sooner you realize that there are no magic creams or potions that are going to make you look younger or more beautiful, the sooner you can think about what products you actually need. 

So what products do you actually need?  For me, that is shampoo, conditioner, bar soap, coconut oil for makeup removal, face lotion, charcoal bar soap for face wash, deodorant, body lotion, hair oil, hairspray, and eye gel.

Products that I like but could survive without are astringent and vitamin E oil.  It's easy to tell the difference between the products that you actually need and the ones you like.  When you go on a trip, a weekend away, or camping (God forbid) what do you bring?  The essentials, and perhaps cyanide capsules if you have been forced to camp against your will, is all you really need.  

When you clean out your bathroom products, use up what you have or give them to someone who will use it.  Stop buying products to look younger or promise to reduce the look of your wrinkles.  The only thing besides a good moisturizer that will actually make you look younger or wrinkle-free is to visit a plastic surgeon for surgical or nonsurgical options.  

I recommend Dr. Joe Gryskiewics at TC Plastic Surgery if you live in the Twin Cities.  I personally get Xeomin, which is just like Botox, injected so that I don't get crows feet wrinkles when I smile.  I also get filler in the laugh lines on my face.  These two things work and I believe they are worth every penny.  I've had other procedures with Dr. Joe and he is a mother f*cking wizard.  I'd rather spend money on something that works than waste time and money on lotions, potions, and prayer.  

*Volcanoes: Mother Nature's Trash Chutes

Volcanoes are a long overlooked resource for waste disposal.  New studies have suggested that this is a solution worth trying.  

One such study, recently completed by Art Vandelay and his team of scientists, suggests that volcanoes act as a natural incinerator.  "My team and I threw everything we could at our test volcano, literally."  Says Vandelay.  "We threw in everything from cotton balls to a cast iron sink, and that volcano was always hungry for more.  One time we threw in a vintage fridge from 1952, full of food, just because we could.  We threw in a twice baked potato, although I guess it would be thrice baked now, right?  I tossed in a couple dozen lobsters, live, of course.  They were fun to watch because those babies turned bright red on the fall down.  That's right, they cooked before they even broke the surface of the lava!  We threw in some hockey sticks, a pair of skates, plenty of footballs.  We rolled in one of those push mowers, nobody likes them anyway.  My personal favorite was when we got a pallet of those jumbo cans of beans from Costco.  Those were Bush's Original Baked Beans in the 117-ounce cans, that's 7 pounds, 5 ounces per can.  We didn't put the whole pallet in, oh no, we savored that and did one jumbo can at a time.  It just sits there a second before it explodes and then you get that faint aroma of beany goodness."

"The key to this form of waste management is to add the refuse in slowly but continuously.  If you go hurling huge loads in, that upsets the delicate balance of thermodynamics.  When that balance gets upset, the volcano bubbles up and spits back at you.  You want a nice easy, steady stream of trash flowing in.  Nobody wants an angry, frothing volcano."

There is a big push to get this system up and running.  If every available volcano was accepting a steady stream of trash, twenty-four hours a day, it could mean the end of our trash problems.  

Mr. Vandelay clearly takes great pride in his work.  "You know what they say, if you love what you do, you never work a day in your life."  

Here is a short clip of a hungry volcano feasting on a sack of trash: click here

Renowned scientist, Art Vandelay  

*Satirical Saturday brought to you by Betty

Dear Betty: Reader Comment 2/15/2019

"I don't have time to recycle."

I get this comment over and over again.  Here's the thing, if you have time to take out the trash, you probably have time to recycle.  

Some things are easy to recycle.  Boxes, pop cans, wine bottles, etc.  They either go right into the recycling bin or just need a quick rinse.  If it takes the same amount of time to put it into one bin versus the other, how can you not have time?  Is it because you have a garbage can in every room but not a recycling bin in every room?  Is it because walking that second wheeled cart to the end of the driveway requires too much effort?

Other things take a bit of effort to recycle.  They need to be rinsed out and sometimes that is a huge pain in the butt.  Rinsing out a shampoo bottle is high on my list of things I despise doing to get something ready to be recycled.  If you hate doing these things why not consider products that don't need to be recycled?  Bar soap vs body wash, for example.  There are a lot of simple changes you can make to reduce the overall products that you use, or by selecting products that don't require recycling, you make it easier on yourself and the environment.  I am not suggesting throwing more arbitrary items into the trash either. 

If you think you don't have time to recycle, consider at least recycling the easy things.  Make a point to buy products that do not need to be recycled.  Make time to recycle and stop being lazy.  Is it that you don't have time to recycle or is it really that you just don't want to?

Do you have a question, comment, or suggestion?

I'd love to hear from you!

Email me at Mrs.Stebber@gmail.com or comment on the blog

Your 102 Ton Garbage Legacy

I learned about my 102-ton garbage legacy while reading Garbology by Edward Humes.  Simply put, the average American will produce 102 tons of trash in their lifetime.  You're probably thinking that there's no way you could possibly make that much waste in your lifetime.  The truth is, you can, you do, and you will.  

The average American makes 7.1 pounds of trash per day.  You don't create that much waste?  Are you sure?  Think about what you are rolling out to your curb each week.  An 8 to 10-gallon kitchen trash bag can easily accommodate around 15 pounds of trash.  Most kitchen bags are 13 gallons.  If you divide 15 pounds of trash by 9 (nine because it is the median number of gallons) you get 1.67 pounds of trash per gallon.  If you use the standard 13-gallon bag, that equates to about 22 pounds of garbage.  How many bags are in your garbage can each week?  You also need to add in your recycling weight, because it is still waste after all.    What are you throwing away at work?  At the restaurant?  At a fast food establishment?  With our buy and toss, disposable lifestyle, 7 pounds adds up pretty quick.   

Each day in America, we send 740,000 tons of material to our landfills.  We bury $50 billion in raw materials each year.  

We produce more garbage when the economy is doing well.  More garbage means more money spent, despite our massive debt and lack of savings.  I think there is a correlation between several of the epidemics that our country is currently experiencing.  The amount of garbage produced is on the rise, credit card debt is on the rise, spending is on the rise, obesity is on the rise, yet saving money and investing in retirement is declining.  It would seem that Americans are suffering from an unhealthy sense of entitlement.  Maybe I'm old fashioned in my ways, but life is easier when you follow the rules.  What are the rules?  Work hard, pay your bills, save your money, live within your means, and be responsible for your actions.  Sound boring?  It's not.

What are you going to do about your 102-ton legacy?  

Weekly Weigh In 2/13/2019

This week the handsome husband rolled out zero bags of trash.  Good work for a family of six.

How did you weigh in this week?

Alex Hallatt's Arctic Circle

Yea for Shea, a Soap Almost Good Enough for Jesus

The handsome husband ran out of liquid body wash and decided to give bar soap a try.  I use coconut water and mimosa flower by Love Beauty and Planet.  The handsome husband tried my bar soap and felt that it left his skin a little on the dry side and left him smelling a bit like a woman.  Since he is a big strong man who wants not to smell like a lady, and can't be bothered to lotion all the time, he decided to find a bar soap that caters to his manly needs.  

He picked out a bar soap for dry skin.  He chose Raw Shea Butter Soap with Frankincense and Myrrh Extracts by Shea Moisture.  He feels that his skin isn't as dry and it smells manly enough for his needs.  I think the smell is one that could be for anyone but it doesn't smell like flowers or long walks on the beach.  He would probably like liquid body wash better, but since he is down for the cause, bar soap it is.  

I should mention that neither of these bar soaps leaves any shower scum.  I ain't got time for dat and neither do you!  They also last infinitely longer than liquid body wash and cost much, much less.    

Shea Moisture is a company that has been around since 1912.  It started as one woman selling Shea Nuts at a village market and evolved into a company that offers a multitude of products today.  Shea Moisture is a company that uses natural and organic ingredients that are sustainably sourced.  They have a promise not to use harmful chemicals.  How awesome is that?  

Slow Clap Presents: GoGo squeeZ

Real Story.  Real Stupid.

GoGo squeeZ hit the U.S. market in April of 2008.  A few months later, in November of 2008, one million pouches of GoGo squeeZ had been sold.   As of 2016, 444 million pouches are being sold each year and sales are projected to reach 3.7 billion per year in the U.S. alone.  The pouch is the latest food innovation to hit the market and people love the convenience it has to offer.  So what's the cost of this convenient snack?

The environmental cost is pretty straight forward here. GoGo squeeZ partnered with Terracycle back in March of 2011.  Sending your used pouches to TerraCycle is the only way that they can be recycled.  As I write this post, Terracycle has recycled exactly 4,827,933 pouches.  I suppose one could argue that that number is better than nothing, however, considering the larger picture, it's an abysmally small percentage.  It's even worse knowing that GoGo squeeZ proudly displays on their website that they recycle with Terracycle.  It is clearly a marketing propaganda tool and not a heartfelt concern for our dear planet. 

The health cost is also something to consider.  These pouches are made from polyethylene, specifically low-density polyethylene, or LDPE.  LDPE is plastic resin number 4 and is considered generally safe.  So safe, in fact, that GoGo squeeZ calls their pouch "an inert and safe material that is used for many of the caps on today's plastic drink bottles."  I'm not sure about you, but that sounds like "they did it too, so it's okay" to me.  Polyethylene is a thermoplastic made from petroleum.  It does not contain BPA but can still leach estrogenic chemicals.  Remember that leaching is more prevalent when the food is in contact with the plastic for long periods of time.  Safe, not safe, who really knows.

The monetary cost varies depending on whether you buy a single pouch, a four pack, a twelve pack, and whether you are buying brand name or generic.   Let's assume you are shopping at Target.  A single pouch will cost 99 cents, a four-pack is $2.49, and a twelve pack is $7.49.  Below is a cost comparison.  When you take the time to figure out the price per ounce, it should make you question how much you are willing to pay for the perception of convenience.

Cost per ounce of apple sauce:

GoGo squeeZ single 31 cents

GoGo squeeZ 4 pack 20 cents

GoGo squeeZ 12 pack 20 cents

Motts 6 pack cups 9 cents

Motts jar 6 cents

Market Pantry jar 5 cents

My two cents:  When we buy products like GoGo squeeZ we are perpetuating the single-use problem that is already out of control.  We rationalize this choice by arguing "convenience."  Is it convenience or are we just lazy?

Rating:  I'm giving GoGo squeeZ 4 out of 5 possible slow claps.  The pouches are impossible to recycle unless you mail them to Terracycle and we already know how many have made it there since 2011.  Recycling isn't the answer here.  GoGo squeeZ made $200 million dollars off of our lazy asses in 2015 alone.  I don't think anyone should make that sort of money off of applesauce but we chose to buy it up and throw it all away.